Here is the transcript from the voice recorder from the Hudson River Crash
PIC is a Pilot in Command, SIC is Second in Command, you all know who Sully is
SIC: "Number two's gone, boss."
Sully:
"I know it! What do I look like, an R-22 pilot (that's a baby
helicopter a real egg beater)? Just shut the f*cker down, boy. Oh, and
tell Departure that we need to come back in and land. F*cking birds..."
SIC:
"Sheesh, somebody got up on the wrong side of his throne this morning.
You don't have to insult me just because I got my commercial helicopter
rating in the mighty Robinson. Oh, and by the way, sir, we're not
climbing, if you even care. Maybe your decision to take on that extra
5,000 pounds of fuel wasn't so hot, Captain."
Sully: "One more comment like that and I'll make sure the union keeps you in RJ's for the rest of your miserable, short career."
<Bang!>
Sully: "SON OF A BIT*H!"
SIC: "Number one's failing, boss."
Sully: "I can see that! Am I a-f*cking-sleep? Can I not read the gauges? Am I not flying the plane here?"
SIC: "I'm just sayin'..."
Sully:
"Goddamn Canadians, sending their f*cking geese down here every winter.
Why, if I ever *see* another Canadian I'm gonna punch him right in the
throat. I *HATE* Canadians."
SIC: "Everybody does, boss. Think we can make Teterboro or straight-in to 22 at Newark ?"
Sully:
"Yeah, probably. But f*ck Teterboro! Let's go to Newark . I've flown
out of Teterboro. Short damn runways...always a crosswind. And their
FBO's suck. I'd rather land in the Hudson f*cking river than land at
Teterboro. Hey...."
SIC: "You're not..."
Sully: "Why not? Maybe we can take out some sailboats with some prick Canadian snowbirds."
SIC: "You ever land on the water before?"
Sully:
"Plenty of times! I got my seaplane rating back in 1946. I think it was
in a...Piper...somethingoranother, I forget. Never mind. It'll all come
back to me. Pull out the Before Water Landing checklist and run it."
SIC: (flipping through the stack of checklists) "Can't seem to find one for that."
Sully:
"Fooled ya! HAH! There ain't one! Just get on the horn and tell the
people to put their heads between their legs and kiss...no wait, that
won't sound good on on the CVR tape...make it, 'brace for
collision'...no wait, make it 'brace for impact.' Yeah, that's better.
No wait! Tell them that out the left side of the plane they can see the
Intrepid Museum , and that if they'd like to visit it, they'll be able
to, this afternoon, like, in about twenty minutes. Oh, and ring the
stews and have them bring me a rum and coke. If I'm gonna do this, I
need a good stiff drink. And have that one with the big t*ts bring it
up. If I'm gonna die, I wanna die drunk and with a boner."
SIC: "Like your grandfather did?"
Sully:
"This is no time to make jokes, son. I would really appreciate it if
you'd try to take this situation seriously. I'm fairly certain that my
grandfather did not die with a boner. I mean, have you ever met my
grandmother?"
SIC: "You know, if you pull this off CNN will be calling you the Hero Pilot of the Year."
Sully:
"F*ck CNN.(Communist News Network) Liberal bastards. All I care about
is what the fair-and-balanced Fox News will call me. I hope Fox News
calls me a hero!"
SIC: (sighing) "They probably will too. Nobody
will remember *my* name. It'll be 'Sully this'...and, 'Sully t hat.'
'Captain Sully, the big f*cking hero.' Like you are the only f*cking
one in the cockpit."
Sully: "You're quite bitter. You really are
a helicopter pilot at heart, aren't you? You know, some pilots wait
their whole career to be called a hero. I mean, Christ, I've only got
eight years to go to retirement. That was close!"
SIC: "We're not down yet, Captain Skygod."
Sully:
"I know, this thing glides pretty well, huh? Dammit, no sailboats. Oh
well, let's see if we can buzz one of those damn sightseeing
helicopters. What's best-glide/engines out?"
SIC: "Beats the s*it outta me."
Sully: "Vref?"
SIC: "F*ck if I know."
Sully: "Britney Spears' birthday?"
SIC: "December 2, 1981."
Sully: "Well, I'm glad you know SOMETHING you lame brained co*ksucker! Just gimme full flaps..."